Stop comparing my orientation to lust

One thing that frustrates me when I come out to straight people is how they always narrow down being gay to sex and lust.  I know that no straight people become gay affirming overnight, most straight people especially straight christians already have preconceived notion about gay people, such as gay people are promiscuous which is the most popular, gay people only pursue sexual pleasure not love, and no gay relationship lasts long. In reality, how many gay people that they know in their life? do they have friends who are gay and live in promiscuity? Many don't, but these preconceived ideas have been perpetuated sadly by the church. It makes me very frustrated  when  straight people think of being gay, they think of lust and sex and any emotional components are ignored. 

Christian, when you  make  the blanket statement that homosexuality is a sin, what you’re really doing without realizing it is reducing all LGBT people down to a sex act; as if that alone defines sexuality.  You’re denying any emotional component in their lives; any capacity to feel real love or show genuine affection toward someone else.

In a gross oversimplification, you’re labeling a complex, fully formed human being as merely a performer of intercourse.   That’s something you would never do with heterosexuality and especially not with your own sexuality, because you understand implicitly that your gender identity and sexual orientation are about much more than a physical act. They’re a much deeper part of who you are than that. You know that in your own life, the physical act of sex isn’t the totality of your sexuality; that it is also about affection and companionship and the desire to love and be loved. It’s about who you are drawn to and attracted to and compelled to be close to.

Lesbian or gay, they belong to minority group of persons who find themselves romantically attracted, through no conscious decision of their own, to someone of the same sex. 

Your sexual orientation is determined by whether you are romantically attracted to people of the same sex or of the opposite sex. If your romantic feelings and sexual fantasies are for people of the opposite sex, your orientation is heterosexual. If they are for people of your own sex, your orientation is homosexual. I’m speaking here about basic, underlying feelings – not genital acts. Persons with homosexual feelings may or may not act upon those feelings during their lifetime; they may or may not express those feelings genitally – just as persons with heterosexual feelings may or may not express their feelings genitally over the course of a lifetime. Homosexual feelings can be loving or lustful, just as heterosexual feelings can be. Homosexual persons may be celibate or sexually active, just as heterosexual persons may be. Homosexual relationships may be either committed or casual, caring or exploitative, exclusive or promiscuous, responsible or irresponsible – again just as heterosexual relationships can be. And, like heterosexual persons, homosexual persons may have many nonsexual friendships-both with persons of the same sex and with persons of the opposite sex.  

In other words, homosexual persons are just like heterosexual persons  except that the gender of the object of romantic interest differs.